As preached by Brother Marc
Holy Wisdom Church
Frederick the Great the King of Prussia was
the one who joked that, “A crown is only a hat that lets in the rain. He also wisely
realized that “Every person has a wild beast inside them.” He quipped, “The more
I get to know people the more I love my dog.”
Some days we might say, “People really are
strange, aggravating, unpredictable and hurtful. They don’t understand. They
ignore, manipulate, and blame. The writer Annie Dillard, from Pittsburgh,
noticed, “In the deeps [of us all] are the violence and terror of which
psychology has warned us. Yet our complex and inexplicable caring for each
other and our life together…is given. It is not learned.”
The priest Ronald Rollheiser, from Austin, says
in a similar way, “Biblical revelation refuses to deny the dark side of things,
but forgives failure and heals our falling... The Gospel says we can survive and
will even grow from the tragedy of life.”
Jesus lived, died and rose with a tragic sense
of life. He was never upset with so-called “sinners,” only with people who do
not think they are sinners! He shows us a higher order that is healing
and renewing inside the world’s constant disorder.
Whenever we uncover “our complex and inexplicable
caring for each other,” or what Buddhists call the Great Compassion, we find integrity
and peace in spite of life’s inconsistencies and contradictions.
Paul says this love in our relationships:
“…always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1
Corinthians 13:7).
Our relationships often have the potential to hurt us
in small ongoing ways. We brush these hurts aside, trying to be good people, thinking
"I am not a vindictive or overly sensitive person; these things shouldn't
bother me." But they do bother, because our egos are like magnets, and that
attract resentments. We choose to forgive another, but still in our heart of
hearts, the anger and hurts linger.
Forgiveness is often seen as permissiveness
for letting a transgressor engage in hurtful conduct. Instead, we may be able
to say or do something helpful. Psychologist Joan Borysenko said, "You can forgive
someone who wronged you [seriously] and still call the police and testify in
court."
Forgiveness
is a teachable and attainable character strength and process also associated
with improved health and longevity. Although
at times this may seem implausible, it is in fact possible to forgive and become
less encumbered by hurts or scars. We can choose to do the hard work and vigilance to
change our vengeful, grudge-bearing impulses and to express our anger in beneficial
ways to ourselves and others.
We might become conscious
of not only of the harm done to ourselves but the harm we have done to
ourselves and to others. We are aware of harm to the earth’s environment and
transgressions against the love of God. Time, suffering and reflection help us
see into the depths of this darkness. So often we may feel a great sadness with
this awareness.
Yet
Harvard researcher and physician George Vaillant describes forgiveness as one
of the eight positive emotions that define spirituality and keep
us connected with our deepest selves and with others.
When we consider
that pain and struggle form the deepest contour of each human face,
seeing it not just in famous photographs but present in someone in our own life
can give birth to forgiveness toward them. We might also find gentle compassion for
ourselves for landing in painful situations.
The forgiveness
we truly need goes beyond forgiving this or that transgression. We pray with
and for each other, “Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against
us.”
Caring may be a
gift, as Annie Dillard wrote, but being hurt or wounded can become our invitation
to a transformative new path and a more fulfilling life.
Create in me a
clean heart, as King David prayed in Psalm 51:10.
This Sunday is really a feast of forgiveness. In
some small ways we need to celebrate this as the end of an era in our lives and
the beginning of a new phase of life.
